Somehow I always end up in strange situations or better yet I end up with past loves assembled around me. So this trip was no different. It was a big football game and a number of friends were making the trip. One such friend, Trent, had rented out party spaces and bars each day surrounding the game. Most were charged entry and a few of us made the guest list. My friends have no respect for the liver. They seem hell bent on destroying theirs and mine. But we do have fun!
I had asked my favorite partner in crime, Linda, to accompany me. She is one hot mess…and I love her! Linda and I have known each other for some years. I met her when she was bartender in college before she moved away for med school and now she is a doctor (Intelligence is still my biggest turn on). She is short with light brown hair and huge chocolate eyes. Her smile….well of course it’s great (my favorite physical trait). Before she moved, we used to have long discussions which were made difficult by the massive amount of sexual tension in the air. We were into each other, but we were also both in serious relationships. Linda is a firecracker! (it seems to me that most short women are) I had heard tails of how crazy she was, but crazy is as crazy does. The tension almost exploded at one of my parties one night. At some point during the night I had noticed pot smoke billowing out from my guest room. (No smoking in the house…Ever!) I had a good idea my girlfriend at the time was behind the violation and when I opened the door I find her, in her tiny bikini with six other guys toking up. She gave me a look and blew it off, like no big deal. I said nothing. Nodding my head, as to say ok…two can play at this game, I shut the door and retreated to the hot tub where Linda and another bartender were sharing a bottle of champagne. When my girl came out, both of them were in my lap. “Shit!” I thought. That really doesn’t work well in reverse. Keep in mind, my girl is a six foot tall Russian with a temper. I am not certain the three of us could have taken her. So in my wonderful drunken wisdom I say “Jump on in!” Surprisingly, she did not. Luckily she left the porch without incident, although that set the tone for her and Linda’s contempt toward one another. For a couple of weeks after, Linda and I kept clear of each other. The rumors flowed, of course.
When Linda resurfaced a few years back we started a fling. I suppose neither of us like leaving unfinished business. Our relationship was and still is casual. After she left, she married the boyfriend that was also at the aforementioned party. Divorced soon after, she has no inclination to ever be married again. This free spirit is not the marrying type. She prefers women these days and I am the booty call when she needs some testosterone in her life. I don’t think it is as much a matter of my sexual prowess as it is my ability to not kiss and tell. She also realizes I am not going to beg her to marry me like every other man she has dated. We get along great, always seeming to have the same frame of mind. The sex is incredible. This may have something to do with the fact she sticks to the ladies, keeping her Hoo-Haa tighter than a vise. The only issue is that she has a real tiny voice. During sex she screams and talks dirty, but I have to cut her off because she sounds like a little girl. I become caught in between feeling dirty and laughing my ass off. This is also what makes her so disarming to people. If they take her for a push over, they soon find out how wrong they are when they cross her.
Once or twice a year we will get together and take a trip. She was all in for the game. I had a nice hotel and box seats at the stadium. At the game, her lioness reared its ugly head when she almost decked an obnoxious fan. Fortunately the gentle, fatherly man in the across the aisle beat her to it. After the game we headed over to the private party. I found my friends dispensing two tables stacked with cases of Fireball and Jager on them and pushing the legs to their breaking point. This was going to get ugly. At some point I see my little personal trainer, Susan, walk in. She had told me that she was not coming and I did not feel the need to share my guest list with her prior. Even though we had agreed to see other people, she still wanted me to herself and attached herself to my hip as much as I tried to lose her. With her and Linda on either side of me, I suddenly feel the kiss of warm soft lips upon my cheek and the familiar smell of a perfume from another time. It was Brandy, another old flame handing me a fireball. She grabbed me from behind in a tight, I missed you, hug. Brandy and I had a short fling once. I actually tried to date her, but we never seemed to connect. My circle of friends had started to gather and become entertained by the building humor of the situation. At some point I lose track of the shots that seem to be nonstop (no thanks to my buddy who takes great pleasure in dispensing them to the ladies) and say “it’s time to go”. Linda agrees and we head back to the hotel for some much needed trick fucking. Relaxed afterwards, I order room service for dinner and we cuddle up in bed. “Why don’t we just stay in tonight?” I say. “You read my mind. We are always on the same plane it seems.” she says. We have had a great day and avoided any drama. I saw no reason to push our luck.
About nine that night, she gets a text from a mutual friend that she has not seen in a few years. It’s his birthday and they want us to come out. We had seen him and his girlfriend earlier but had little time to talk, so we felt obliged to join the celebration. Once at the bar we found the usual suspects. Shots still flowing, we have had a break at least; these people were on level 28! Of course, Susan has shown up. My buddy, Trent, tells me that my girlfriend’s a little drunk. Trent is a great guy and a smartass. He owns a bar in town and we hang out often to stare at the beautiful women. Word is something happened between him and Susan a few months back but both deny it was anything close to conception. I have never claimed her as mine, so I see no foul. At this point I am really hoping he will try and rekindle that romance to take her off my hands, as I try to urge her to quit drinking. I’m handing her water and he’s right behind me with shots. So I turn my attention to him, fully explaining that he is going to be responsible for her care later. The next thing I know she is up in front of the stage dancing with Linda. Ok. At least maybe it will burn some of the alcohol off. Trent is asking me all kinds of questions about Linda. He apparently has a thing for her, as most men do. I tell him good luck with that. Have you ever been to a party where you are the only sane one around? I was that guy. My efforts to round up the crew and head out only succeeded when the bar closed. Linda comes to me with a big hug and sexy kiss, “I like her. Can we take her back with us?” she says. Now guys, I know what you’re thinking, but NO! Hell no! Linda wanted to play, but I could definitely see how that would turn out. “Well we can’t leave her. She has no ride.” she pleads. Cabs are sparse at this hour, so we walk with the rest of the crew back over to Trent’s hotel to catch one (and hopefully leave Susan in Trent’s capable hands). Trent had rented out a half floor of rooms in one of the most prestigious hotels in town. It was the perfect place to incite mayhem. Huge Romanesque columns marked our path down preteen marble floors. The place had an ice skating rink on the second floor and upon hearing that Linda took off on a mission. Upon arrival, we found the doors semi-barred from the inside. This did not stop Linda, who’s tiny frame easily slid through the passage to seal our charge of B&E. Thankfully, even drunk, a couple of falls onto rock hard ice take the fun out of sliding around at 4a.m., so I herded the bastards back upstairs where they pushed the party on. It’s loud. Its wild; and surprisingly no one has called the police. I guess that is what $800 a night buys you. Trent decides to order up room service. He then orders a bottle of wine that I know is expensive even when you can find it at a specialty shop, much less in this palace. I try to urge him to reconsider, knowing that he and I are the only ones who know what is and the only ones who will appreciate it. The rest of these drunks just want to keep their buzz going. The food arrives and is torn apart in no time. Savages. I sit back and enjoy a fine glass of wine. I have given into whatever this night wants. The girls are full and passing out on the bed. I am happy, but really want to get back to my own bed. Trent asks me to drink the last glass of wine that Susan took one sip of. Of course, I am not going to let such a fine vintage go to waste. Just when I thought this debacle was ending with no injuries or arrest, it happened. I saw it coming even before it happened and I saw it in slow motion. As Trent goes to hand me the wine off the table, he knocks it off onto the carpet. The white, custom made, ornate carpet. “Uhh…that’s gonna be expensive” he says. I shake my head in agreement, “yep”. That glass of wine cost him thousands. I think all he got out of it was a hangover. Time to go. I fumble around and try to wake Linda and Susan, who are cuddled up on the couch together. I start to worry if they have been kissing, but realize that they are too far gone to see it through and so is everyone else. They stir and try to locate their accessories. As I make my way to the elevator, I have lost Linda. Trent catches me and tells me that she wants to stay there. He ask if it is ok with me. “Cool with me” I say. I was a little surprised, but didn’t care much at this point. It was time to un-ass myself from this mock orgy.
I end up with Susan back at my hotel. She starts to get upset about the whole thing and want to talk. It is now 5 a.m. How the hell is she still awake after all the booze? Hell…how is she still alive? All I want is sleep. So I did the only thing I knew to quiet her. Thirty minutes later, sweet, deep, blissful sleep!
The morning came and her friend swung by to pick her up for the ride home. She was contrastingly different from the sprite young lady of last night. I got her in the car and grabbed a coffee in the lobby as the women of the front desk did their best to solve the mystery of the new woman in my life. Some of the other guest Linda and I had spoken with the day before were equally confused. I smiled and greeted them with a hearty good morning, still rockin my RayBans and black tee from last night. Up to my room for more quiet time.
Somewhere around lunch, Linda shows back up to our hotel. We shower and head out for some much needed Bloody Mary’s and brunch. The Sun’s rays casting symmetrically between buildings as we walk through the calm streets. It’s Sunday in the city. Hardly any traffic, the few fans making their way to their favorite hangover cure. The smell of bacon and coffee mix in with fresh laid asphalt. It’s my favorite time in any city. It’s pure. Finishing our first drinks, Linda and I pick up the conversation that our kindred spirits felt no need to prior. This is why we work. We are in tune with each other. There is no jealousy and no judgment. I pause to notice how good she looks with no makeup as she starts to speak. “So…did you and Susan used to date?” she ask. “Yep” I reply as we both enjoy the anonymity of the place from behind our sunglasses. In a strange town, you don’t care who hears your conversation. “I figured that is why you didn’t want to take her back with us last night. She was hot, but that was probably a good thing. “ she says. I nod my head in agreement and we both return to making fun of the beast the bars have churned out from last night. Hypocrites we are. “So did you have to fuck her to shut her up?” she asks. Now any other women would have given me pause before I answered, but I never felt that way with Linda, so without hesitation I said “Yep”. Linda went right along taking a sip of her drink, grabbing another bite of her steak then placing her silverware back in the exact same spot. She is always so neat with everything. We started putting the pieces of the puzzle from the night together, laughing a little too loud at times. When we finished talking about Trent’s epic fail and carpet purchase, she offered up “I didn’t sleep with him you know?” I didn’t, but I was not going to ask. She reads me well and if there is something I want to know, she will always tell me without my having to ask. She went on to say that she wasn’t into him, much less many men in general. At first I started to feel a little guilty about sleeping with Susan, but that feeling was soon washed away. Her mood set me at ease. She wants to sleep with whoever she wants and she wants me to do the same. With everything else in common, we also share the same intimacy issues. So while the ladies are her drug of choice, I often contemplate the significance of my being her go to guy.
That was not exactly the ending I had imagined, but I write these stories on the fly from memory. When we write things down, sometimes the clarity of certain situations comes out.
Did I mention the game was great?